Poem For Subarata

Sometimes I still come across
these old photos of you,
moments from a life, salvaged
from the blur of time,
here sepia brown, grumpy-faced at six
on your first pony ride, anxious mother in tow
and here in sharper tones, with a schoolgirl pal
dolled up and blazing with rebellion,
poised on the brink of your first glorious
expulsion from school.
Look, now I've turned up and we're jammed
hilariously into a photo booth, wreathed
in smoke and smiles, hamming it up
for the cheap snaps.
And here's a poignant one, waving gaily
at the camera, arms aloft,
goodbye, goodbye, a last unwitting valediction.
They somehow bring into a momentary focus
the blurred incomprehension of a life
and with it too that unrelenting pathos,
aching like a toothache at the sadness of it all.
Yes, retrospect brings such pathos, knowing as we glance
from snap to snap what's coming next
like a film whose end you know before it starts
and how everything that seemed so sure –
parents, dogs, uncles, school pals, life itself – all
of it, gone away, gone.
And now you've vanished also into myth and story,
resculpted by memory into something
much simpler than you were,
leaving us rummaging through these old pics
and brooding over the big existential questions
and marvelling at you, as you actually were,
alive in that present, so bright with life and expectation,
so real and true, that you could step
out of this glossy, full-color shot in your red jeans
and yellow hair and end my disbelief
with your smile.
Today the flowers on your shrine have withered.
The race trophies are laid out like memorials,
your clothes hang limply on the rack.
Even your toy pandas seem forlorn.
Nothing lasts, no, not love, hope, despair,
no nor memory either.
– Jogyata.
Gulls
They came again this dawn
an avian rabble, beaked brutes
clambering over my tin roof like a break-in,
clumsy intruders poised
to storm through my skylight window,
banging open seashells
in a fusillade of clatter,
shrieking in querulous dispute
over scraps hauled from the city tip,
plumage soiled by the grime of plunder.
No longer sea-birds, you lot,
but city slickers, glutted on garbage,
forsaking the tedium of oceans
for the bedlam of the county dump
motherlode of scraps,
easy pickings for a street smart gull
idling away the afternoons on my roof,
feathers afluff and dozing in the sun –
lazy as sin,
visiting the coasts only on weekends
shamed by your dumb cousins
the albatross and petrel,
exiles traveling the lonely places
drifting across those endless, empty spaces,
wandering alone the deserts of the seas
on calm, unmoving wings.
– Jogyata.
Child-Sweet
Your love prised me open like a clam
numb heart
opened to an oyster pearl
of giggling joy
nose twister
bouncing on my poor chest
like a mad puppy
growling in my ear
tiny hands pushing flesh
into a dozen pleasing shapes
putty face stretched into a
samurai, frog and monster.
And now you deck me out
in nature's finery,
a beached, snoring Neptune
bejeweled with flotsam from the sea–
cat's eyes and kelp, pale sea lettuce
bleached herring bones and
coral shards for teeth.
Aroused from my mock sleep
I rear up, roaring
and you rush into the sanctuary of sea
shrieking from this monster you've created.
Under a warm sky
I cast off clinging robes of kelp
spit sand and guard
your playing in the tide.
Child-sweet, brief thing of flesh
I guard your playing in the sea
with my own quiet eyes
of love.
– Jogyata.
Past Lives
Boothill, buzzards, buttes, badlands,
an old shack on the river’s edge
and the lazy brown hills
climbing away into pale silhouette
high blue, faraway.
And at dusk
smoke from the fires,
saddle smells, carbine and cordite
sweet earth
and the fragrant wind out of the dark.
Then the long nights
strewn with stars,
almond blossom white and bright
in the cold vault of sky.
Yes, I remember, I remember.
Ride on ghost cowboy,
this life ain’t big enough for both of us.
– Jogyata.
Mrs. Jewel and the Earthquake
When I was just a little lad
my Poppa said to me,
"It's time to make your old man proud,
a pianist you shall be."
He sent me off to music school
with tutor Mrs. Jewel.
The name was inappropriate,
in fact she was plain crewel.
Just one wrong note, she'd shout my name
and strike me with a cane.
My little digits went all blue
and caused a lot of pain.
I mastered preludes, rattled off
arpeggios and scales,
while Mrs. Jewel lashed and yelled,
"In my school no-one fails!"
But one day kind fate intervened;
we had a largish 'quake.
The house began to rock and pitch,
the earth began to shake.
A flight of ducks fell off the wall,
a fishbowl – it was shattered.
A pot plant crashed, a painting flew,
my tutor's nerves were battered.
She sprang up from the piano stool,
she lurched towards the door.
She staggered vainly round the room
then tumbled to the floor.
"O Lord !" she cried, "my hour has come."
She gave an awful wail.
Her eyes took on a ghastly hue,
her features went all pale.
And though all round, destruction reigned,
the scene I did ignore,
including Mrs Jewel, pale
and cowering on the floor.
For I, more terrified of she
than of this odd dilemma,
I played straight through the episode,
ignored the seismic tremor.
I dashed off triplets, semibreves,
it was my finest hour,
while Mrs Jewel upon the floor
could only wail and cower.
Each note was true, my fingers flew
across the tinkling keys.
I played and played and couldn't stop,
my father's hopes to please.
At last the 'quake it passed us by,
my tutor left the floor.
A new respect was in her eyes,
she staggered through the door.
"You'll never make the stage, my boy
Your father may be shattered,
but a brave young man you'll one day make."
I really felt quite flattered.
"While musically you mightn't be
the maestro we had thought,
the qualities you've just displayed
they can't be sold or bought."
With that she clasped me in her arms,
you wouldn't have believed.
She swept me from the piano stool,
a giant hug bequeathed.
And from that day the Big Quake came
to stop her reign of terror,
she made the simple heartfelt plea:
"From now on call me Sarah."
My old Dad quietly took the news
I wouldn't be a star.
He said, "I've still got faith in you,
I think you'll go quite far."
"I think a lawyer you could be,
this time you mustn't fail.
Let's see if you can make it there..."
but that's another tale.
– Jogyata.
Earthquake
At first it was a laugh
the vase, trembling
then tiptoeing across the mantelpiece
and you caught the tumbling flowers
just in time
and that tiny hairline fracture
in the plaster, roof to floor –
I dreamed of magma, pouring through
the cracks, a white-hot underworld and fire.
We pored over maps, yes the fault-line
somewhere right beneath,
imagining the giant plates grinding
shockwaves tumbling houses,
fleeing cattle, death
waiting for the hills to
undulate like waves
the jutting prows of continents collide
and unseen carapace of earth
cliffs five miles high and right below
moving, moving, an inch or two
to change or waste our lives.
All night long we listened.
The radio talked about the Big One, a pulse
metronomed inside my fingers, counting down.
The cicadas had fallen silent and the moon
flared in your witless, reassuring smile.
I tasted fear, planned my exit
from the falling shattered walls,
waited for the dawn.
– Jogyata.
Enhancing Our Literary Heritage
On occasuns that are numerus
– it's really rather humerous –
We get quite lost in sillines
And literary dilliness
And ponder on apostrofies
And quibble on apostasies
Of grammar and syntacticals
And colons, get fanatical.
The object's to communikate
Not nitpick, mutter, obfuscate
And if I choose to spel 'you' yu
And 'cat' as kat or 'queue' as cue
Or something else that may seem mocking
Or ignorant and deeply shocking
Then let's not live life fecklesslie
Let's live a little recklessly
And step outside the stifling box
Of 'can' and 'can't', I say a pox
On those who always bend their knee
To grammar, long live Heresie
And I say (tho' it may seem treasun)
Let's have some fun, abandun reasun
Run rampint thru decorum's 'ought'
And 'should' and 'must', let's not be corght
By stodgie rools and regulations
Hurrah for de-sanc-tif-if-ication
And if this seems ikonoclastic
Or verging on the plain bombastik
Then dot your 'i's and cross your 't's
And go your way and others pleeze
But me I luv mixed metafors
And always feel the better for
My gaucheries and malaprops
Ineptitudes and missed full stops
I'll choose another road.
And when I'm far too old for scrabble
Inventing great new words like 'zabble'
I'll still get joy mispelling names
And you can tut-tut, point and blame.
The fire that warms arthritik knees
Kindled by the dictionairy
Thesauruses will feed the flames
While I rejoice in Pictionairy.
– Jogyata.
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