Transcendental

Fifteen years ago, I came to Chicago in June to go to school for three months, and I became a disciple a few days after my arrival. I was sharing an apartment with a girlfriend from Michigan and her husband. I liked Chicago but didn't have any definitive plans to stay there after the semester ended. In August, about a week before the semester ended, my friend's husband and I got into an argument, and it had the effect of making me want to leave Chicago. It was as if a cloud came over the whole city and I couldn't distinguish between discontent with my living situation and the whole city of Chicago. I decided that as soon as I finished my semester, I was going to go back to Michigan to live in a nice small town like Ann Arbor. I was quite fond of everyone in the Chicago Centre, so I decided not to tell anyone my plans. I was sure they would try to talk me out of leaving. Besides, they would soon be going to New York for August Celebrations. I could just quietly move away and let them know later. I had every intention of remaining a disciple, but I was too new to realise that living on your own without the support of a Centre is not a good idea. The only problem with my plan was that every time I meditated, I would have a strong feeling that I would miss the Chicago Centre and that perhaps I shouldn't leave. One day while I was meditating, I made a deal with Guru's Transcendental picture. I said, "Okay, maybe you are telling me I shouldn't move back to Michigan, but I am not sure. I promise that if Guru tells me outwardly that I should stay in Chicago, I will stay, even though I don't want to. If he tells me outwardly, I won't be able to doubt it. However, I am not going to ask outwardly. I am only asking inwardly." As a very new disciple, I hadn't come to see Guru yet. My only connection was with his Transcendental photo. I vaguely knew there was this guy in New York who would ask Guru a question for you, but I didn't know him. I also thought it was a fair deal. I would ask inwardly and Guru would respond outwardly if I were to stay. I wasn't fully conscious that this deal was slanted in favour of my returning to Michigan. I came to the last Centre meditation before everyone went to Celebrations, and after the meditation, I started talking to another girl about hiking and other outdoor activities. From this, somehow the conversation led to living in the city as opposed to rural areas, and before I realised it, I had told her that I was thinking of going back to Michigan. I didn't think too much of it though, because she was not going to New York, and the others were leaving the next day. She only came to the Centre once a week, and I didn't think she would say anything to anyone. I was wrong. She told Sukantika that I might be going back to Michigan. Sukantika told Pradhan. Pradhan told Guru. I didn't know any of this had happened, but a few days later I came back from school and my girlfriend told me Pradhan had called me from New York. She said I should call him back because he had a message from Guru for me. I was surprised, but I called and found out that Guru said I should stay in Chicago. He also said that I should ask his advice if I am planning to make a big change in my life. I was a bit shocked, but I had made a deal and now I had to stick to it. Amazingly though, all the bad feelings about living in Chicago left me. In fact, I started feeling like it was really a great place, and soon I moved into an apartment with another disciple. From this experience, I gained a lot of faith in Guru's Transcendental photograph.

Suchaturi (New York)